mother mode.
offload
You don't need a better way to carry it.You need less to carry.
Offload takes the things you're remembering, checking, organising, deciding and following up, and works through them with you one at a time, until fewer things depend on you.
Founding price for the first 20 mums. Then $97.
Try it properly. If it's not for you, reply to any email and I'll refund it. No forms. No convincing me.
Already done the free Mother Mode quiz? Your list is waiting inside.
Haven't done it yet? Start with the free quiz
mother mode.
27things
still on your list
still on your list
25 once you finish the 2 you've started.
Next up
The shopping list, wherever it currently lives
Things you added
Mother Mode, so far
- 90,000+
- people following along on TikTok and Instagram
- 21 million
- views on TikTok this year
- 4.2 million
- views on Instagram in the first four weeks
- 28
- things off one mum's list, sorted with Offload
The stuff that counts
None of this is particularly hard.There's just so bloody much of it.
Knowing the toothpaste is nearly gone. Remembering library day. Realising someone's shoes are getting small. Booking the dentist. Thinking about the birthday present you haven't bought yet. Knowing Thursday dinner needs to be quick because there's swimming.
Each thing is tiny. The problem is that they all keep coming back to the same place: your head.
- library day Thursday
- toothpaste nearly empty
- book dentist
- RSVP to party
- buy present
- school shoes getting small
- swimming re-enrolment
- permission note
- rego due
- cancel subscription
- what is for dinner Thursday?
What if the goal wasn't remembering all of it better?
Most systems help you keep track of the list.
Offload asks a different question:
Does this actually need to keep being yours?
- DeleteIt stops.
- AutomateSomething else remembers.
One thing at a time
Here's what actually happens.
What's for dinner tonight, and tomorrow
It's on your list because you're the one thinking about dinner before anyone is hungry.
Sort it
What's for dinner tonight, and tomorrow
Where does this one go?
Automate.
Automate
What's for dinner tonight, and tomorrow
What's for dinner tonight, and tomorrow
The cooking takes forty minutes. Deciding what to cook has somehow been running since breakfast. What's for dinner, do we have it, does anything need defrosting, will everybody eat it. The cooking is one job. The deciding is another.
The idea
This playbook puts the deciding bit on a rotation. Write down a couple of weeks of dinners your house already eats, put them somewhere visible, and reuse them. Someone still cooks. This just means dinner doesn't need a brand-new answer every afternoon.
If repeating dinners sounds boring, fine. It might be. The useful question is whether you care more about novelty or not deciding dinner from scratch every day. Your call.
What you need
Your notes app or a piece of paper, plus the dinners your household already eats.
The setup
- 1Write down the dinners that genuinely work at your place. Don't add aspirational recipes just because this is technically meal planning.
- 2If the list is short, use easy formats you already eat: pasta, something on rice, eggs on toast, freezer dinner, leftovers. They count.
- 3Spread them across a week or fortnight and match the easier dinners to the nights that usually need them.
- 4Put it where the household can see it: on the fridge, or as repeating all-day entries in the family calendar if you have one, so it shows on every device. It doesn't need to look good, it needs to be where people already look. When somebody asks what's for dinner, point them at wherever the list lives.
- 5If it's useful, keep a basic shopping list alongside each week of dinners so you aren't rebuilding the same ingredients every time.
- 6Swap nights when life happens. Add a new dinner when one works. Drop one nobody wants anymore. The rotation is a starting point, not dinner law.
What this should stop you doing
The goal is fewer 4pm dinner decisions and less rebuilding the same plan every week.
Check it's working
After a week or two, check whether you're choosing from the rotation more often than you're inventing dinner from scratch.
If it breaks
- A meal keeps getting skipped. Take it off the rotation. Apparently it wasn't one of the regulars after all.
- You're still planning from scratch most nights. Check whether the list is easy to see and whether the meals on it actually fit your week.
- Someone wants something different. Swap a night or add their suggestion. The system can survive a request.
- Holidays, visitors, sick week: use it when it's useful, pause it when it isn't. You do not need to rebuild the entire system because Tuesday went sideways.
Ready to mark done
You've got a visible list of dinners you actually eat and you can use it without re-planning the whole week.
The dinner playbook opens.
Before
- Think about dinner every day.
- Decide.
One list, sorted
She started with 47 things.
47on her list to start
The bit that matters
This is what you end up with.
Not a prettier list of everything you still have to do.
A record of what changed.
mother mode.
The new picture
Your list started with 47 things on it.
It's got 19 now.
- 10 automated.
- 11 deleted.
- 7 handed over.
- 19 kept on purpose.
Your full picture showed that a lot of the job happened before the doing: you were the one noticing it existed. Here's what changed. The 11 things you deleted aren't happening anymore, so there's nothing to notice. The 10 you automated now have a system doing more of the prompting. And the 7 you handed over moved with the noticing included, not just the final task.
That's 28 things you don't have to notice first.
19 things are staying because you chose to keep them.
More things will end up on your list. Come back and sort them when they do.
- GoneThings that stopped entirely.
- Runs without youThings a system now remembers.
- Not your jobThings someone else owns.
What's inside
Everything you need to actually do it.
mother mode.
35things
still on your list
still on your list
To sort35
House11
Kids8
Feelings5
Admin8
Self3
Your list
mother mode.
You're carrying 47 things.
A lot of these became your job because you noticed them first. The toothpaste was low. The form was due. The shoes were getting tight. You saw it, so now apparently you own the sequel too.
Someone else doing the last bit doesn't change much if you still have to notice, ask and follow up.
So that's the bit we're going after. Not just who does it. Who has to notice it exists.
Each thing gets one of four routes
- DeleteIt stops, because nothing breaks.
- AutomateSomething else remembers it.
- Hand it overSomeone else owns the whole job.
- Keep on purposeIt stays, because you want it.
Your full picture
mother mode.
27things
still on your list
still on your list
25 once you finish the 2 you've started.
To sort23
House4
Kids7
Feelings4
Admin6
Self2
Started2
Settled10
Delete3
Automate3
Hand it over2
Keep on purpose2
The sorter
Automate
What's about to run out
What's about to run out
You know when the washing powder is low because you looked. That's the whole job. And then there are toilet rolls, toothpaste, dishwasher tablets, shampoo, bin bags and whatever else apparently has stock control now. The useful bit to move is the checking.
The idea
Two simple options: regular items can use a repeating order or recurring reminder; everything else can use a one-spare rule, where opening the spare is the trigger to add the item to the shopping list.
What you need
Your shopping list, plus whichever ordering or reminder system you already use. Repeating delivery is optional, not required.
The setup
- 1Walk through the places you store household basics and note the things you regularly check or suddenly discover are empty. Start from this list and cut what doesn't apply: toilet paper, tissues, paper towel, dishwasher tablets, dishwashing liquid, washing powder, bin bags, surface spray, shampoo, conditioner, body wash, soap, toothpaste, deodorant, sunscreen, paracetamol (adult and kids), bandaids, coffee, tea, lunchbox snacks, pet food, batteries.
- 2Mark the items you use predictably enough that a recurring order or recurring reminder could make sense.
- 3If you use recurring delivery, start conservatively and adjust after a couple of cycles. If you'd rather shop normally, set a recurring reminder to check or reorder those basics.
- 4For the other items, one spare can work well where the budget and storage space allow.
- 5Make sure adding something to the shopping list is quick. Voice add is handy if it works reliably on your phone.
- 6When a spare gets opened, add the item to the list then. Other people can use the same rule where it makes sense. If an item repeatedly bypasses the spare system, move that particular item to a recurring reminder or order instead.
What this should stop you doing
The aim is fewer random cupboard checks and less keeping a private stocktake in your head.
Check it's working
The system is working when fewer basics are unexpectedly running out and the shopping list is getting triggered by the spare, not by you remembering.
If it breaks
- Something runs out. Work out which bit failed: it wasn't included, the spare wasn't added to the list, or the recurring timing was off. Fix that item rather than rebuilding everything.
- Deliveries pile up faster than you use them: skip one and lengthen the gap.
- You're still checking cupboards. Give the system a few cycles before deciding whether it actually reduces the checking.
Ready to mark done
The regular items have a recurring system where useful, the spare rule is set up where useful, and adding to the shopping list is easy.
Twenty playbooks
Your house doesn't have to work a certain way.
Partnered, solo, shared custody, grandparents involved, nobody particularly useful, whatever. Offload works with the people and systems you actually have.
If there isn't someone to hand something to, don't. Delete, automate and keep still work exactly the same way.
mother mode.
1 of 2
Who lives at your house?
Change it any time if things change.
Who made this
It was all living in my head.
I'm Abbi, mum of three boys. Just thinking about how much had to get done and happen before Christmas was too much.
Asking someone else to do it didn't help much, because I still had to keep track of whether it got done.
So I made Offload. Less is weighing on my mind now, my head is clearer, and I don't worry I've forgotten something, because it's all in there.
Abbi
Offload
Let's see what can leave your list.
One-off payment. $67.
Founding price for the first 20 mums. Then $97.
Get in. Use it. If it's not for you, reply to any email and I'll refund it. No forms. No questions.
What you get
- Your quiz list loaded into Offload
- Full Picture
- Complete sorter
- Delete pathway
Before you buy
The questions people actually ask.
Do I have to finish it all at once?
No. The point is not to create another project. Do one thing, five things or disappear for a week and come back.
What if I haven't done the quiz?
Start there. It's free, and the things you tick become your starting list inside Offload.
What if most things genuinely are mine?
Then we work with that. Handover is only one of four options.
You already know how to carry the list.
Let's see what you can stop carrying.
Founding price for the first 20 mums. Then $97.